Before Jason was born, his older brother's problem became apparent to his pre-school teacher. Holding up a large, plastic, blue square, she said, "Henry, can you tell me what color this is?"
Henry arched his head. "What do you mean?"
She sighed sadly; the boy was too stupid
to be taught.
"I don't understand why you wanted to see us." Jason's mother nervously took her husband's hand. "Is Henry misbehaving?"
"No, no..." Henry's teacher paused a moment to think of a way to break the news delicately. "Sammy, can you come here please?"
A young boy named Sammy rolled up in a wheelchair, and politely waited for further instructions.
The teacher smiled thankfully. "Sammy, could you now stand up for us?"
Obediently pushing himself out of his wheelchair, and onto his feet, Sammy fell to the floor in a heap.
Seeming proud of the result, the teacher said, "You see, most children are able to walk sometime around their first birthday, but Sammy is already four and can't even stand."
Jason's father jumped in, "Well, it seems like his legs are somewhat deformed..."
Shaking her head, the teacher stopped him, "No... Sammy's simply too dumb to walk. As intelligent as he may seem, his mind is like that of an infant - that's how it is with all physical
Jason's mother unknowingly squeezed her husband's hand tighter.
The teacher lifted a pencil and went on. "Can both of you see this?"
They both nodded fearfully.
"I'm afraid that Henry isn't even able to do that... he has a severe form of mental retardation called 'blindness'."
Placing their hope in a second opinion, Jason's parents took Henry to a specialist.
"Amazingly enough, Henry's IQ is off the charts."
Jason's parents beamed at each other.
"Oh, I'm sorry... you misunderstood," said the specialist in response to their positive reaction. "I meant that Henry is immeasurably stupid."
The look on their faces became what the specialist was hoping for.
He removed a piece of paper from a folder and handed it to Jason's mother. "This is the multiple-choice portion of Henry's test. He didn't circle any of the possible answers - he just drew scribble down the side of the page."
Jason's mother burst into tears. "What can we do?"
The specialist's face became very firm, yet compassionate. "I recommend having another child... perhaps Henry can be his pet."
Jason's mother had a particular knack for interior design, and always felt that her great efforts were overlooked by Henry.
After Jason was born, and was finally able to speak, he looked up at the painting of a kitten and said with murderous intent, "It's pretty, Mommy."
Interpreting his statement as a compliment on the way the painting's colors went with the couch's upholstery, Henry's fate was easily decided.
It took some effort to find a doctor who would perform a twenty-eighth trimester abortion.
Henry asked where they were going throughout the entire trip to the clinic, but it was assumed that he'd be far too dimwitted to understand the explanation.
Jason's parents stood firm in their decision as they said their stoic goodbyes to Henry. Despite the fact that he was sobbing in confusion and fear, they left him sitting alone on the examination table, so that the doctor could see him.
After the door was closed, Jason's mother could no longer contain her emotions, and ran up to the window to get one last look at her son. With tears pouring down her face, she mouthed the words 'I love you', but Henry was too stupid to notice. That moron.