is anybody here a doctor?

So I got my dick pierced last night. I was just walking by a place that does that sort of thing on my way home from work and figured, what the hell... I have a few minutes to spare. I could tell that everyone else in there had their dicks pierced, and I didn't want to be left out. Who wants to be the guy that only has one hole in his penis?

It turns out that the penis has a good deal of nerves running through it... who knew. Have you ever had a nurse stab the shit out of your arm because she couldn't find the vein?.... that's what happened to my dick. I don't know what exactly she was looking for, but I basically have a swollen pincushion for a member now. Needles are bad... but needles around penises?

The wound is leaking some sort of reddish pus. It scabs over occasionally, but then the dam breaks, and it starts leaking again. I'm too busy to get it looked at... I might if I have some time this weekend. For a quick fix, I dipped it into some hydrogen peroxide, threw a sandwich baggie over it, and tied it off. It seems to have stopped bleeding, and I can't feel a thing down there anymore.

I'm actually pretty proud of how thick it is right now, but once the swelling goes down, I'll just be a normal White male again... well, a normal White male with a pretty sweet diamond stud sticking out of his dick. Two words, people: 'bling bling'.